The Proving Drawer
Good morning you hot exhausteds.
I was sitting at my desk the other day and found myself starting to pick, then nitpick, then full-on stab at something that happened earlier in the day. Cruelly dissecting everything until I’d wrung myself - and everyone else inside the blast radius - out with only the most ungenerous conclusions.
When I got up to get a drink of water, I reminded myself about my rule to run these fun, little “hot takes” through an almost third-party-diagnostic before categorically believing them and then catastrophically acting on them as if they’re real - now knowing that often times I am not a reliable narrator in these situations.
Which is when I got this vision of the proving drawer on The Great British Bake-Off and how bakers put their bread in this little warm oven compartment for a certain amount of time to let the dough rise.
I downed my water and thought… that’s what I need to do. I need to put all these little “hot takes” into the proving drawer and wait to see what happens to them after a little bit of time, watching to see whether the cruel words rise or deflate when left to their own devices.
Because whenever I can do that, the simple act of withholding judgment until after it spends time in a very patient and loving proving drawer - that just wants to ask a FEWWW follow up questions, if that’s okay - 10 times out of 10 I find a better solution than whatever bananas shit I was thinking thirty minutes prior.
As I get a little older, it’s amazing to me how much patience seems to be the quality, ughhh… that I need to be the most patient with in myself.
Each month, I’ll gather:
🤩stuff to watch, read and listen to
🤝great follows on social media
🌈 music to soothe
🥑 good food and great places to eat and drink
🕯calming things
*****
🤩
I’ve got my summer reading stack all ready to go once Book Ten is all turned in. I may have gone a LITTLE nuts in Vroman’s - I got Frankenstein and The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyl and Mr. Hyde (i’ve never read them!) and then I got Sally Rooney’s Beautiful World, Where Are You as well as A Court of Thorns and Roses. I also got two NYT Crosswords books. I am so excited.
There are rumors of a new season of Kingdom: Legendary War, so my nieces and I watched the entire first season and it was so fun and the perfect show to watch as a group. (we watched this one on Prime Video)
There’s a new season of Grantchester and we have a new vicar! (I watch this one on PBS)
Season Four of My Life is Murder is out and it’s one of my absolute favorites. (I watch this one on Acorn)
TBH, with the Book Ten deadline - my brain is actual mush. In those couple of hours I’m not writing, I’ve just been watching My Life is Murder reruns and Gardening Shows (of course) and then crawling into bed at 730PM.
BUT, the three shows I have lined up Post-Deadline are:
The Acolyte - I’ve only heard amazing things about this one!
The Bear - I have the second and third seasons to get through.
Murder by the Lake - I do love a good mystery.
Discovered Poppy Ackroyd (thanks to Herbert Music) and it’s great morning background music - it’s a BIT more cinematic and driving than some of my past Twinkly Morning Offerings, but it’s lovely.
🤝
Follow Hendry Angle-Mezah for truly mouth watering food, all things France and amazing roller blading.
Follow Siseng because dear lord the food.
Follow Nadia Park for all things coffee and she just opened up her own cafe!
🌈
CKay - love nwantiti ← this is a PERFECT summer song
🥑
If you’re wondering what’s fueling this crawl to finish Book Ten, it’s THIS.
And THIS.
For our big family birthday party - dubbed Leochella as NINE of us are Leos - we hired Gordo’s Caters and DEAR LORD the food. If you’re in the LA area, I cannnnot recommend him enough. SO DELICIOUS.
🕯
Okay, I’ve done my testing and can happily say ALL FOUR of the sunscreens I bought did NOT break me out - which is a frigging miracle. I’ve worn three of these not only on my body, but also on my face. The last one I’ve just used on my body, so I can’t vouch for how it’ll fare on your face. (I’ll post the toner next month!)
THIS is my favorite of all four:
Jumiso Awe-Sun Airy-fit Daily Moisturizer with Sunscreen.
It felt the best on my skin, has a lovely glide to it and was the easiest to rub in. It also stays on and even with swimming and all things sunny, I haven’t burned at all.
This is also the one I wore on my face at that pool party I mention below - standing around dumbly in direct sunlight for HOURS. Sure, I had a bucket hat on, but I didn’t get ANY color with this one - which is WILD.
But! THIS one is also amazing:
Round Lab - Birch Juice Moisturizing Sunscreen
I wore this one standing in line in the BLISTERING sun for 90 minutes and I not only didn’t burn, but I didn’t even get any color at all. I was shocked, quite frankly. Highly Recommended.
And THIS one is perfect for your purse:
Beauty of Joseon - Matte Sun Stick
The issue with this one is that - like stick deodorant - the glide is stuttered. So, you kinda have to really DRAG it across your skin and I was never sure I got full coverage. BUT, for my purse? It’s perfect, because it’s totally great for re-applications throughout the day.
But! THIS is the one that I use on my body (haven’t used it on my face!) when I go into the pool and it’s doing great - so far NO breakouts:
Nivea Sun Protect Super Water Gel SPF 50+++
I wore this one at a pool party where I dumbly stood around in a tank top for HOURS in direct sunlight - and I only got a litttttttle bit of color. I was so sure I was going to be burnt, but NOPE. This one worked GREAT.
I’m in my full Protect My Skin Summer - not unlike Brat Summer, if you ask me - so mind you I’m also wearing THIS and THIS in the pool. What a gift I am.
My Life is Murder is the absolute best!
My 15 year old doggo, Maggie, passed away in April, and after a week of doing nothing + crying, this show was the only thing I could stand to watch. My favorite thing about it is that the cast look like they're genuinely having a blast together. :-)
Thoughtful, I like. I don’t subscribe to many things; your thoughts reach me in a challenging but uplifting way. I’m older and if there’s anything I’ve learned (it hasn’t been gradual, but comes crashing into consciousness) it’s that patience is mandatory. Your proofing box will serve you well. Time is a partner on our side, and is ultimately the one we dance with last. We do not dance alone and it finally comes to me that my best moves are when I allow my partner to lead.