The Best We Can
Good Morning, you probably sweaty overtireds.
I’ve had too many conversations with friends where someone feels guilty about something they bought or ate or drank or watched or listened to. And I know, I’ve banged this drum before, but… GIVE YOURSELF WHATEVER YOU WANT RIGHT NOW. Seriously.
When I say that - to myself or anyone else - the response is always immediate and some version of fearing you’re becoming this weak-willed, debaucherous, bankrupted glutton who was apparently at a crossroads and purchasing that plush toy of Kermit as Constantine from the Muppets Most Wanted is what sent you (dun dun dun) DOWN THE WRONG PATH FOREVER.
You’re in the middle of a global pandemic, surviving what will go down as one of the most morally bankrupt administrations in history, in the middle of a huge socio-economic recession, trying to figure out how to save the Post Office, stuck in your house, not realizing you haven’t taken any kind of time-off because (unhinged hysterical laughter) what even is that and grabbing a mask and hand sanitizer on your way out of the house like it’s your wallet and keys, missing, loving and hating everyone all at the same time. And that’s just THIS WEEK.
Shit is fucked up.
So, buying a pair of Nike Dunks or an Air Fryer, and listening to folklore for the 1,000th time isn’t a sign that you’ve lost it, it’s a sign that you’re paying attention.
I know we all want to be mentally healthy, fiscally responsible and to respect our bodies. But… maybe we can find a compromise for the foreseeable future where we carve out some compassion for ourselves given the context of what we’re living through and recognizing that we are doing this stuff because we are struggling.
We are all struggling. Every single person you know. Every. Single. One.
And I know you want to be the kind of person who can “handle it” and NOT reach for some external thing, but you’re doing the best you can.
It’s like Brené Brown says: If you must admit that someone (including ourselves) is doing the best they can, then what’s the boundary?
Here’s an example of one of mine: Every morning, I make the same smoothie. It’s full of everything healthy and tastes like actual garbage. I may order a JVC Green Vegetarian Burrito from Burrito Express at lunch because, goddammit, I’m doing the best I can, but my boundary is drinking that Garbage Bag Smoothie every morning so I don’t fully abandon my body and drive my mental health even further into the ground.
WE. ARE. DOING. THE. BEST. WE. CAN.
Say it out loud. Right now. With me: I am doing the best I can.
Now go drink your Garbage Bag Smoothie, queue up the 1 and eat Honey Nut Cheerios for every meal.
xoxox
Each Monday morning, I’ll gather:
❤️funny tweets
🤩stuff to watch, read and listen to
🤝great follows on social media
🌈 music to soothe
🕯calming things
*****
❤️
(Thank you to Annie for that gold ^)
🤩
This Go-Gos documentary was awesome - their origins in the LA Punk scene and the music… ahhh, so good.
One of my favorite BBC mysteries is back with a new season: Endeavour. Oxford! The 60s! Origin story of a beloved character! I love it.
I love this Bluegrass cover of Rocket Man by Iron Horse. (Thank you to Mary Robinette for this one)
Bowen Yang and Matt Rogers’ podcast, Las Culturistas, is always an escapist delight. But, truly the three episodes counting down the Top 200 Moments in Culture History were beyond. Here’s a SAMPLING: 152: Jameela Jamil’s Multiple Conflicting Stories About Getting Chased by Bees 107: Whitney Houston when she went “And IIIIIIIIIIIIII…” 103: Sonia Sotomayor <— genius.
🤝
Follow Adrian Lipscombe for delicious food and taste tests of truly ridiculous candy.
Follow Cristina Martinez for mouth watering barbacoa and then go watch her episode of Chef’s Table.
Follow hiaj for gorgeous photography and her hiaj.eats for delicious food and then go buy all the stuff from her Cool and Brown Shop.
🌈
(thank you to Daniel for this track ^)
🕯
I’ve definitely talked about Maangchi before as she is a national treasure. But lately, I’ve been turning to her Saenggangcha (ginger tea) recipe a lot. It’s super easy to make (just two ingredients!) and you keep the concentrate in your fridge and nip into it when you need a comforting cuppa or your stress-stomach is flaring. I’ve also been having it iced and it’s bright and lovely. (Thank you to Annie for bringing Maangchi into my world)
TLo is one of my favorite people in the world - a fellow tea enthusiast and avid traveler - she just started her own candle company, One North Candle, with candles based on places she’s visited. Tennessee is my own personal favorite, btw.
What we have here is an entire podcast of just different cats purring. It’s called the Purrcast and you definitely want to give it a listen. (thank you to Joe for this one).
This Songs 90s Feminists Listened To Spotify playlist is a thing of beauty and will put you in an immediately good mood.